I just wanted to mention that I've been bitten by an ostrich in my lifetime. And also by an armadillo. I believe this to be a distinction that not many can match.
These incidents both occurred during a trip to a petting zoo when I was six years old.
The ostrich was a hungry bugger. I was holding a hefty hunk of bread in my hand, which was hanging by my side as I was checking out some rather unattractive turkeys. The ostrich snuck up behind me and the next thing I knew, my whole hand was in his mouth. He got the bread, and I got a bandaid.
The armadillo incident was negligible and without effect.
I'm actually pretty proud of all of this. I mean, who do you know who can say they've been bitten by an ostrich? Or an armadillo? Or BOTH?